Saturday, September 19, 2009


I don't understand perspective. Well, at least that is what I have been told by a professor when I was in my first year of the art program at the University of Utah. He pulled me aside and asked if I could meet him before class the next day. He told me that either I had to get grasp on perspective or I needed to re-think my major and perusing an art degree. Wow, straight through the heart. Art was my passion, this is what I was going to do. I wanted to go into computer graphic design, and I loved, loved, loved art history. He suggested I order a book and practice. I did what he said and ordered a book from the bookstore about perspective. I spent many hours drawing and practicing so that I could improve. I thought I was getting better, he pulled me aside one day after class to tell me that he was sorry, but I just wasn't getting it and he asked me if I ever thought about pursuing something else. What? I did what you said old man! I get perspective just as much as the next person dammit. Plus, why do I need to draw angles on a building perfectly or draw somebody's face with all the right shapes, I am going to be designing things on the computer with a program. I liked my art, I thought it looked good and I put all my heart into it. I would consistently get Ds and Cs on all of the projects I turned in. Well, to fast forward, it discouraged me enough to quit the art program after 3 semesters. The reason why I didn't want to continue is there was 40 spots and 200 people applying to continue the major and guess who was the one that was making the ultimate decision? Yes. My crusty old professor that thinks I know nothing about perspective. I didn't have a chance. My art days were over. I sill love art, art history and design, I just don't do it as a job. I ended up quitting school and heading for Europe for a couple years. When I got back I went back to school and got my degree in Health Promotion and Education. I really like my health degree and I have been able to do lots of good with it. It is weird how we are lead to things we never thought we would want to do, it was a good fit at the time. But, when I look back I think, how crazy is it that because of somebody's perspective on my perspective I didn't get to do what I had hope to do. And then it gets me thinking about what is perspective, really? I have been told my whole life that I think differently than other people. That I have a really weird perspective on things. It has created problems. I have a different perspective on what perspective really is. Maybe instead of looking at life from the side, I look at from the bottom or the top or at a spiral. As I have gotten older, I have decided that having a different perspective on things make things much more interesting and I enjoy being unique or "weird". I am not going to apologize for it anymore. I am not going to get a book to try to teach me what I already know, but I just feel it and know it in a different way. Hmm, maybe I should go back to art school.


  1. I like the personal format. It's nice to hear about JUST you. Your family and kids are great too, but I can see why you wanted a special place to express more of yourself.

    That's heartbreaking about your art school experience. I felt similarly about my equestrian schooling. I had high hopes and was disappointed when I wasn't succeeding as well as I thought I should. I pushed myself in all the wrong directions and couldn't do it like everyone else. I too feel that I see life a lot differently than most other people.

    Did you design the butterfly on this blog? It's really cool, even if you just picked it out.

  2. Well I understand that pain, I grew up in a basically small town senario, horse back riding, art, writing, and dancing were my life, I had no friends out side those fields! Haha! So after pushing my self to stay thin, eat very little, I had to much curves so I used to tape my breasts, hold my breath for photographs, and often worked out harder than anyone else. Pushed my self to extremes. So thought I was pretty hot stuff when it came to my arts, come to find out Im too tall, too busty, my hips are too wide, and was too fat, when I wasn't! Well maybe now, as I am approaching thirty, and have had two kids, and heaps of accidents rendering me in capable of excersizing like I used to. So by default I learned the art of making food, and then I became a foodie, even though it stands to point out it kills me to stand for long periods of time. I've also taken up book reading, and being a mom. Going to college too, and not for any particular reason or degree, just to go. :) *HUGS* you write beautifully, you are gorgeous, your kids are adorable! Keep on shining!

  3. I really like this post